Category Archives: Parenting

Parenting tips, advice and articles.

A study conducted on victims of bullying

A study conducted on victims of bullyingIn a study conducted by the Crime Victims Institute at Sam Houston State University it was discovered, bullying that occurs early in life may have significant repercussions for the victims later in their life? Childhood bullying can lead to general and mental health issues, behavioral problems, eating disorders, smoking, alcohol use, and possible homelessness.

Science Daily reports, “The Long Term Health Consequences of Bullying Victimization,” recommends investing in victim services and effective prevention programs, such as the Olweus Bullying Prevention Program, a school based initiative for violence prevention. Programs can help address the immediate trauma, both mental and physical, that victims experience.

“This type of investment may also have the added benefit of reducing the long-term deleterious effects identified in this and other studies, thus reducing the high cost of victimization born by the victims themselves, the health care system and society in general,” Bouffard said.

The study was done over an extended time and still to this day is ongoing. The study began with a select few individuals born between 1980 and 1984.  Of those in the group that had been studied it was determined that 19% had fallen victim to repeated bullying. It was discovered that those who had been bullied had higher rates of emotional and mental problems that interfered with their school or work. Those that were of bullied had an increased risk for developing eating disorders, smoking, alcohol consumption, physical victimization or even being homeless.

Bullying these days has been taken to a whole new level with not just physical bullying but cyber bullying as well. Everyone needs to take part in making the behavior not acceptable.  Parent’s really need to watch what their kids are doing and find out more information about the group of friends they are hanging out with.  For the kids who are going through a living hell everyday they need to be honest with their parents and the staff at school. If you don’t tell anybody what’s going on than no one will know.

I remember someone in high school that was bullied by a bunch of girls and even got beat up, had to go to the hospital.  She was terrified to even go back to school.  Kids liked her generally and she was an active cheerleader at her school but this group of mean girls did not. After going to the hospital and finally recovering she ended up going back to school. The school set up mediation with the group of girls.  They all talked it out and could say whatever they wanted.  After the mediation she became friends with the group of girls.

I do believe there is hope. These are the kids of our future and we do need to instill good moral values and self-confidence. We need for kids to think for themselves and not partake in the bullying. Walk away and take away the bullies audience. If you take away their audience then they have no one to perform in front of.

Please join me in the fight against cyberbullying by using the hashtag #callout (The Bully’s Name). I check this almost every day. I will report them if necessary and become a mediator or advocate to try to end the bullying. You can also send me personal emails to asktina4advice@yahoo.com or send me a message on FB.

#callout to end cyberbullying

#callout to end cyber bullying

As I roam the realms of social media talking with my virtual friends I notice a string of threats and name calling.  I click on the post to see what in the heck is going on and read threatening tweets to other teenagers. Some of the kids who were threatened are begging them to stop. It doesn’t just happen on Twitter, it happens on all social media platforms.

I remember bullies back in my childhood days, running kids into lockers and pushing them onto the floor. This cyber bullying is taking it to a whole new level.  So kids that wanted to feel included or part of a crowd will participate in the original post to show that they are cool or part of a more elite group. Kids who would never speak to anyone the way they do publicly can now do so virtually.

I guess what makes me mad is the fact that other kids still haven’t learned how to NOT be followers. Why aren’t they making their own decisions? Why do they think that someone who hurts another person emotionally is elite or someone that they can look up too?

These kids wouldn’t continue to do this if they didn’t have any audience.  If nobody really cares about the comment that they posted then no one would engage in the conversation and it would stop.  If parents monitor their children a little more or taught them morally what is right and wrong then they wouldn’t have done it. If they had enough self confidence in themselves then they wouldn’t resort to causing someone else pain.

My goal with this post is when you as a viewer read a post of someone being mean or threatening, no matter who they are then type #callout @(Their Name).  I want to compile a list and discuss the issues further and maybe try and put a stop to it.  This will work if everybody joins in. Let’s at least try to make this work because someone you know and love could find themselves in a cyber bullying situation.  I will keep you updated on the progress of this post weekly. Get the word out!

If you would like to know more about my plan or how to help please feel free to email me at asktina4advice@yahoo.com

Don’t judge a book by its cover

Don’t judge a book by its cover

As I look into her eyes I see an intellectual soul that is smarter beyond her years. The way she is interested in history and science amazes me beyond belief. I never thought my 11 year old would beat me at every single solitary game that I play with her. Who knew she was such an artist, a comic writer an author? She is so charismatic and free with her thinking. I wish I could be more like her. I wish people could know what I know about her. I wish more kids could see beneath the awkward behavior that isn’t much different than other children her age.

She isn’t trying to be cool; she could care less about being cool. She likes to wear bright colors and talk about different cultures of the world. She wants to live in Tokyo one day and have the job of a traveler. She reads a book every night because she wants too. She likes to go out to eat because she likes the same food made in different variations. She doesn’t like the smell of food cooking if it isn’t pizza or pasta. She will look at a ketchup bottle and gag. She will get mad if someone breaks a rule and tell you.  She will look disappointed if someone curses. She will tell you if you are going over the speed limit.

My daughter has Autism and believe it or not I wouldn’t have it any other way.  I couldn’t imagine her as anybody else. If you meet another little angel who has Autism take the time to meet them and I guarantee you will meet a very special person. Parents don’t pull your children away from a child who may come off as a little different instead have a chat and be kind.

I just got finished filming a documentary about Autism. I have written for several websites on the subject of Autism and have decided to open up advice to the subject matter of Autism.

Children are growing up fast

Children are growing up fastI think back to the days when I was young, the thought of the tree house in the back yard was very exciting. Gathering inside our fortress with other kids from the neighborhood was just the norm. I rarely watched TV; I don’t believe I watched TV till maybe middle school. Being outdoors was my forte along with occasional playing pretend games with my dolls.

My neighborhood was a beach town and most of the kids got along because there were no others to play with till the summer crowd came. I remember the snow coming in and making snow angels, laughing and giggling like little girls should. My mentality was that of a young child with no worries, except to be a kid.

Now I look at the world around us and it has definitely changed some good and some bad, children are growing up fast. The world of electronic is within every child’s reach from home to school. We can find out what is going on in other parts of the world with a simple click of the mouse. Then we have many social networking sites in which children have access. The world is at their fingers, instead of going out and socializing with friends it can now be done online.

The child who is scared to speak in public is now a TOP DOG on the internet because he/she can now be the person they always wanted to be with no consequences. Is the internet been beneficial to our children? They can now experiment with dating without parental control, with free access to all the predators the internet has to offer. Little Susie can now show her boobs on the internet to all the pedophiles she wants and don’t forget the boys at school.

Of course Susie’s little followers at school now have to be cool and show themselves to pedophiles as well because Susie is so cool and has a banging body. Now she is a bog hot with all the boys and that’s how I want to be. Followers usually get nowhere real fast. They are desperate for the approval of their peers who they feel our somehow more superior than them. This is not true. Why care what others think? Is Susie going to really be a friend in the long run? Susie “the superior” will most likely be knocked up and dropping out of college if she gets that far.

The real friends in school are the friends who care about your well-being and do not threaten you if you do not do as they say. A real friend is with you till the end and will have your back when others knock you down. Parents try and be there to support your kids and talk with them about peer pressure. Times have changed dramatically from when we were children. Be open minded and just listen because if you don’t then little Susie has the upper hand. Monitor internet access and find out what your child is doing. Keep an open line of communication so they don’t keep secrets from you because you’re a complete bitch and they will get yelled out for telling you.

Just wonder in your mind what your kids aren’t telling you rather than what they do.

Top 10 reasons you may need a vacation

Top 10 reasons you may need a vacationHaving just taken a mini vacation and feeling revived from the wonderful experience I thought this may be a fun way of asking yourself if it is time for you to take a vacation.

Top 10 reasons you may need a vacation:

1. When the site of your house is boring you.
2. When you feel like your on the verge of going off on somebody at work because they said Hello to you.
3. When you start analyzing why the dog tore up your favorite shoes.
4. When a day at the spa stress’s you out.
5. When someone tells you about their vacation and you get mad at them.
6. When your kid’s teacher marks the homework wrong that you helped them complete.
7. When going to the grocery store is a night out on the town.
8. If you haven’t taken down your Christmas tree and it’s the end of January.
9. If the Travel Channel annoys you.
10. If you step on dog poop everyday for a week straight.

Let me know why you need a vacation?

Check out some Vacation Ideas that may interest you.

Thank you for visiting, please take a look at the Articles and of course the advice section called AskTina with questions submitted to me by the public.

You can also send an email to asktina4advice@yahoo.com with the subject as Advice.

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All questions will be answered within 24 hours at the very latest!

I look forward to speaking with you!

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Do Anti-Bullying Programs in School Work?


After a three month study of students who were of elementary age that participated in an anti-bulling program in Seattle it was discovered that there was a 72% decrease in harmful gossip.

The study was conducted by the University of Washington to see if the anti-bullying program was effective in preventing childhood gossip which has been shown to cause real damage to children.

Science Daily reports“Gossip is an element of bullying, and it can lead to physical bullying,” said Karin Frey, a UW research associate professor of educational psychology. “Kids will tell you that gossip is just as painful as physical bullying.”

Some of the staff including teachers do not view gossip as bullying. Gossip can lead to physical bullying, it was important for researchers to investigate the anti-bullying program results. The study revealed that having supportive friends and not choosing to harm another in retaliation when victimized by harmful gossip significantly decreased further victimization.

The 610 participates of the study were recorded using Palm Pilots with second by second observations of children in grades 3 through 6 at six different elementary schools in Seattle. The child’s behavior at the playground for five minutes once a week for 10 weeks in the fall and then for another 10 weeks in the spring were recorded.

After listening to the gossip at the playground the anti-bullying program began in 36 classrooms. The teachers taught the Steps to Respect lesson and encouraged empathy, assertiveness and taught that bullying is not the social norm.

The students who previously gossiped on the playground then attended the Steps to Respect lessons and displayed a 72% decrease in gossip when observed after the program was completed.

The researches say that kids who fight back against the person who is bullying them often makes them more of a victim and the Steps to Respect Program teaches them not to fight back. The thought is to have good friends that tell you to get out of the situation and just leave. The study also suggest that bystanders are important in decreasing gossip and bullying as well. By having someone watch it will empower the bully.

“Stand up straight, look the bully in the eye, and say ‘knock it off,'” Frey said. Friends who encourage victims to retaliate, on the other hand, may inadvertently set victims up for continued bullying, she said.”

Thank you for visiting, please take a look at the Articles and of course the advice section called AskTina with questions submitted to me by the public.

You’ll never know till you try it, you can ask me a question via instant messenger (IM) on the AskTina website. The IM client I use is Meebo, in the section that says “Type here” you would type your question and then click Enter to submit it. It’s easy enough! If I am not online I will still be sent the message, if you would please include an email in the IM I can email you when the answer is posted or if it is not chosen to be posted you will still be sent a reply. Each email will be answered and personalized to fit your question.

You can also send an email to asktina4advice@yahoo.com with the subject as Advice.

If your mobile and would like to submit your question via direct message on Twitter than click here

For Facebook users, click here

All questions will be answered within 24 hours at the very latest!

I look forward to speaking with you!

Be sure to subscribe via email for new posts on the upper right side of page.

College women and the HPV vaccine


A recent study reported by Science Daily it is suggested that women who reach adulthood are more likely to get vaccinated for human papillomavirus (HPV) if their mothers recommend getting the vaccine.

“Mothers talking to their daughters were an important factor in whether young women were vaccinated,” said Janice Krieger, lead author of the study and assistant professor of communication at Ohio State University.

“It is an encouraging finding, because it shows that communication between mothers and daughters can be very helpful, even if it may be difficult sometimes.”

The research involved 182 pairs of mothers and daughters. The daughter all went to college with their average age being 20. The daughters filled out a survey about HPV and mailed a similar survey to their mothers.

From the 182 pair participates, 137 discussed the HPV vaccine and 45 pairs did not discuss it. The discussion of the parents with their daughters was not made public but it has been speculated that they may have discussed, safety concerns and cost. The vaccine is a 3 shot series that typically is estimated to cost $360 – $600.

Nearly one-third of young women and teens who start the vaccine do not complete the series. It is important for mothers and daughters to discuss the options of getting this vaccination. It is uncomfortable to discuss concerns with their sexual health but it can be a key to it’s prevention as well

The Center for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) says that HPV is the most common sexually transmitted disease with 40 different variations that infect both male and females. Most of the people who are infected do not know that they have it.

In 90% of the individuals with HPV symptoms do not develop and the body’s immune system clears HPV naturally within two years.

Those who do experience symptoms may have genital or warts of the throat. If you didn’t think that was bad enough then listen to this, certain types of HPV can cause cancer of the vulva, vagina, penis, anus and head/neck to include tongue, tonsils and throat.

HPV has infected 20 million Americans with 6 million new cases discovered each year. It is estimated that 50% of all sexually active men and women get HPV at some point in their life. With numbers that great it would be crazy not to protect yourself.

College women and teens need to consider getting vaccinated, if your parent doesn’t bring it up then you bring up the subject with them and discuss how you can get vaccinated.

Thank you for visiting, please take a look at the Articles and of course the advice section called AskTina with questions submitted to me by the public.

You’ll never know till you try it, you can ask me a question via instant messenger (IM) on the AskTina website. The IM client I use is Meebo, in the section that says “Type here” you would type your question and then click Enter to submit it. It’s easy enough! If I am not online I will still be sent the message, if you would please include an email in the IM I can email you when the answer is posted or if it is not chosen to be posted you will still be sent a reply. Each email will be answered and personalized to fit your question.

You can also send an email to asktina4advice@yahoo.com with the subject as Advice.

If your mobile and would like to submit your question via direct message on Twitter than click here

For Facebook users, click here

All questions will be answered within 24 hours at the very latest!

I look forward to speaking with you!

Be sure to subscribe via email for new posts on the upper right side of page.

Legit work from home jobs

I know times are rough with the economy and a lot of people being laid off. As a parent I know you worry about your kids and some would rather stay home but also have some way to get legit work from jobs. They are out there but you must remember that this is work and you must put in the hours if you plan on making working from home a reliable means of income.

If you are motivated and have a computer then you can find legit work from home jobs. Having a quiet place to work is essential in your success to working from home. A lot of the jobs I have found that you do not need to work 9 – 5 but rather get the project done by a specified deadline. You can then schedule and mange your time effectively while kids nap or at night.

If you like to write then there are many freelance writing opportunities for you. I must admit that I got my start writing for Suite101 and Examiner. I didn’t do it for the money but more so for the experience and to build my writing portfolio for potential employers. I wrote for them for awhile to build up my writing skills and to have all of my articles in one spot. Make sure if you are writing for the Examiner that you pick a subject that really interest you and that you are familiar with. Both of these jobs pay per page view.

Once I got a pretty good portfolio online I started to work for BrightHub. Working for BrightHub was a great experience and gave me good knowledge of how to write articles for online publication. You will work closely with an editor which is a great experience to have. The editors there are always available and willing to help. The community is full of very smart people who write good articles. The pay is $10 per article plus pay views. Not a lot of money but well worth the experience.

I then started to have people approach me about other writing opportunities by having my articles published online. My ultimate plan was working. You must work very hard depending on how bad you want it.

One day while looking for other writing opportunities I came across Elance. This site is terrific. There are all kinds legit work from home jobs on this site. It is comprised of Employers who are looking for people to do specific projects or jobs. You place a bid for the job that interest you and write a job proposal, the potential employers either accept or rejects the bid. Most employers will look for people with good reviews from other employers so to land that first job will take some work.

What I did for my first job was bid low and write an awesome business proposal after doing much research. I finally figured out which business proposal people liked. I did not pay for a membership until I got my first job. You can pick one category with a free membership and apply for a certain amount of jobs per month in that category which is fine in the beginning till you start making money.

Once I got a job I then got a membership to apply for jobs in other categories and receive priority connections which places your bid at the top of the list of other bids. I highly recommend this site and wish you happy bidding.

I would love to hear about your experiences.

Kids keeping secrets


It’s so hard in this day and age to know exactly what your child is “really” doing at all times. With the changing times, both parents are working and kids have more free time alone. The internet has made it easy for pedophiles to search for children in need of a friend. Kids keeping secrets from parents is happening everyday. Some parent’s just don’t want to know the truth.

First and foremost there should always be open communication. Again, I repeat there should always be open communication. You do not have to be the child’s best friend but a child needs to know that they can tell you anything and receive helpful advice. Just knowing that a parent is receptive and open to discussing the way the child feels means more to the child then anything in the world.

If there is a disagreement about how a situation should be handled, the parent should give logical feedback about why there solution is necessary. The child may not like it at the time but I assure you later when they are in their room sulking and rethinking what has been said they will know that the parent’s solution was for the best. Imagine if you were a child and you had no one to give you any guidance or lead you down the correct path, feelings of abandonment and as if the child is not an important role in the family may take place.

It is important to know that kids keeping secrets is not a healthy option. Just think of all that a child could go through on a daily basis from being pressured to have sex, drugs and alcohol, bullied or made fun of at school and on top of that having to keep up with school work. Now add a troubled family life to the equation for some, this can be a lot to take on as a child. Some children may have no one to speak with and try to find a friend on the internet. Those are the type of kids that pedophiles pray on. They make them feel important and loved, as if there parents don’t understand them but they do. The child may seek a “daddy” type figure outside of the home.

The world is a scary place and having open communication with your child is key to their success. You may agree to disagree but at least you are showing them the correct path to follow and laying out the consequences of inappropriate actions. I think teens especially learn well by shocking them. If they are doing something that you disagree with such as considering sex then let them meet teens who are raising children or teens who have contracted a disease. Find articles that they can relate to and then have an open discussion in which they can talk freely without repercussions.

Kids are the future and we should be helping them every step of the way to become the great leaders that they can be. Every person on earth has a purpose and discovering your child’s can be just exciting as discovering your own.